Friday, November 13, 2009


Marriage is a covenant and a lifelong journey. Every marriage will have ups and downs, as well as plenty of trials and rough times. The choices made during these times can most certainly make or break any commitment. But what exactly can you do when the bottom has seemed to fall out?There is couples counseling, books, conferences, and marriage gurus galore. Truth is every relationship is not a one size fits all deal, so the fix will be just as different for one as another. But one thing is for sure, if your life is not anchored to God then it will never work out for the good. If your marriage is not as solid right now as you need it to be or would like for it to be, it is definitely worth taking any risks necessary to hold on to it. Some people are willing to try anything and today's world will try to throw plenty of ideas your way. Yet the main thing is to keep the Lord first. For many this might include coming to the Lord for the first time in a long time, or maybe coming to God for the first time period.
Take 10 minutes a day to reconnect. No talking about kids, bills, jobs, etc. Talk about today, tomorrow, and the future together. One night a week for a date would be a great start as well.
Focus on the good. Stop trying to fix each other or whats wrong. The Holy Spirit can do the fixing if you will get yourself out of the way long enough. Understand each others needs. Conflict destroys marriage.
Maintain lines of communication that build up compatibility. There is always a huge valley between how couples act and what each one actually expects. Fill this valley with the Lord and Righteousness. In other words, meditate on the Lord before acting or saying anything when your spouse fails in your expectations.
Share your expectations, desires, frustrations, etc. with each other; and make a list of them together. Pray over this list and revise the list when needed.You must know your partner intimately and understand them. This is the basics of a relationship, and what true love is built out of. By the same token, if you don't have a relationship with the Lord that is intimate and understanding, then you don't know true love, and you can't give someone else something you haven't got. All things in life begin and end with God, through a relationship committed with and through His Son Jesus. This is the foundation and root of true love. The more you honor the Lord, the more honor and love will be manifested in your marriage. This will produce a joy in your marriage that is beyond any other. The more you give yourself to the Lord, the more you can give yourselves to each other. This will totally transform not only your marriage but your life as well.
Just because life is a struggle doesn't mean your marriage has to be. Trust Jesus He'll see you through.

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